Everything wet stinks...
wet hair
wet grass
wet dirt or sand
wet clothes (left in the washer)
wet animals
wet basements
wet diapers (infant & geriactric)
wet crotches (admit it!)
wet shoes
wet noses (my own)
wetlands
wet carpet (especially with pet urine)
wet dishes (dirty ones)
wet ashtrays
wet mops
wet people (sweaty)
wet poop (dried doesn't really smell)
wet blood (and all other bodily functions)
wet paper (like old books)
wet cement or asphault
wet bathing suits (or anything else that was in the lake)
wet wood or forests
wet toothbrushes
wet nail polish
wet socks (after a run)
AND MY FAVORITE: wet pet food ugh!
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
The Answer to WHY?
My second shoulder surgery went as usual but when I came to I had to think my surgeon made a horrible mistake. Like he screwed up mistake. My arm was soooo tingly and achy and half-asleepy and I did NOT experience that the first time 'round. So I got fibromyalgia. I thought only old, decrepid people got that but no, I can too. And it sucks when you don't have good drugs for it...which I didn't get for 6 months until I went to a rheumatologist. While seeing this doctor she finds a lump. I just thought everyone's necks felt that way and was only told to self-check my ta-tas, never my NECK! Turns out I had a tumor on my thyroid and it was cancer and it spread to surrounding lymphnodes and I'm 29.
The day the doctor called to tell me the biopsy was malignant was the day my step-daughter's mother got admitted to the hospital for pneumonia. 4 days later she was dead. She was 36. It was the freakiest thing. The pneumonia turned septic on Friday. She was put on a ventilator Saturday. She cardiac arrested on Sunday which caused a massive stroke. She was unresponsive and tested braindead on Monday. She died on a Tuesday. My step-daughter is 13 years old and now lives with me and her dad full-time. It's been quite the adjustment for everyone especially for my 4 year old son who doesn't truely understand what's going on?!!
Through the viewing and funeral and all that I tried to push my cancer aside or at least BACK in my mind to deal with at a later date and I generally succeeded until the day of I got the results from my total thyroidectomy.
I don't know why that day was so hard. I knew it was cancer but it was confirmed by a lab AGAIN and I saw a picture of my rotten-ass thyroid and it wasn't pretty. I cried A LOT. I felt lost and in a fog. I wondered if I was gonna die. I dreamed about my son all grown up and I wasn't there. I thought about how death would feel. I knew God chose me b/c I'm strong but WHY?? That I still don't know and may never til I look at Jesus face to face and ask Him.
Today I got my radioactive iodine treatment. I have to be quarantined b/c I can't expose my kids or my husband or our kittys or our stupid shark (that jumped out of his tank a few weeks ago and bit me when I was trying to save his life) to all the radioactivity flowing out of me like some superhero. So that's where I sit...in a hotel alone for the next 4 days.
The day the doctor called to tell me the biopsy was malignant was the day my step-daughter's mother got admitted to the hospital for pneumonia. 4 days later she was dead. She was 36. It was the freakiest thing. The pneumonia turned septic on Friday. She was put on a ventilator Saturday. She cardiac arrested on Sunday which caused a massive stroke. She was unresponsive and tested braindead on Monday. She died on a Tuesday. My step-daughter is 13 years old and now lives with me and her dad full-time. It's been quite the adjustment for everyone especially for my 4 year old son who doesn't truely understand what's going on?!!
Through the viewing and funeral and all that I tried to push my cancer aside or at least BACK in my mind to deal with at a later date and I generally succeeded until the day of I got the results from my total thyroidectomy.
I don't know why that day was so hard. I knew it was cancer but it was confirmed by a lab AGAIN and I saw a picture of my rotten-ass thyroid and it wasn't pretty. I cried A LOT. I felt lost and in a fog. I wondered if I was gonna die. I dreamed about my son all grown up and I wasn't there. I thought about how death would feel. I knew God chose me b/c I'm strong but WHY?? That I still don't know and may never til I look at Jesus face to face and ask Him.
Today I got my radioactive iodine treatment. I have to be quarantined b/c I can't expose my kids or my husband or our kittys or our stupid shark (that jumped out of his tank a few weeks ago and bit me when I was trying to save his life) to all the radioactivity flowing out of me like some superhero. So that's where I sit...in a hotel alone for the next 4 days.
quarantined for cancer
I'm sitting in a hotel room alone for the next 4 days b/c I have cancer. Needless to say, getting cancer sucks but this whole year has been one thing after another. I start this blog in review of the worst year ever...
May 2008 I have been recovering from shoulder surgery which I can honestly say is the worst DRAWN OUT pain I've ever had (cuz birthing my son was by far the worst pain ever but that was over in a day). I've been in a sling since the day after Christmas and have been spending my days going to physical therapy and trying to change diapers one-handed. I remember having this rollercoaster ride feeling almost constantly waiting for the bottom to drop out. People told me to chill out...little did they know just 8 months after the first surgery I tear my shoulder again.
I was tossing my 40 pound son around and rough-housing and actually felt it tear (teeth clenching as I type this). I sat down crying b/c I wanted to know why RIGHT THEN why this was happening to me. And by February of this year I would have my answer...
May 2008 I have been recovering from shoulder surgery which I can honestly say is the worst DRAWN OUT pain I've ever had (cuz birthing my son was by far the worst pain ever but that was over in a day). I've been in a sling since the day after Christmas and have been spending my days going to physical therapy and trying to change diapers one-handed. I remember having this rollercoaster ride feeling almost constantly waiting for the bottom to drop out. People told me to chill out...little did they know just 8 months after the first surgery I tear my shoulder again.
I was tossing my 40 pound son around and rough-housing and actually felt it tear (teeth clenching as I type this). I sat down crying b/c I wanted to know why RIGHT THEN why this was happening to me. And by February of this year I would have my answer...
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